Well I don’t know how things are in your part of the world, but around here, the past two weeks, everyone seems to be in complete panic mode regarding the H1N1 flu pandemic…

News of the 13-year old hockey player and now the 2-month old baby who have died of H1N1 have for sure fueled the panic.  Add to that the vaccine shortage… people lining up 5-6 hours to get their shot… people getting turned away because they don’t fit into the high risk groups (kids 6 months to 5 year being among the high risk group accepted at the moment).  Lots of indecisiveness and confusion about what to do with the vaccine… We are bombarded by conflicting information on a daily basis.   We have decided to go ahead with the H1N1 vaccine (despite my having been the biggest skeptic when it comes to the regular flu shot, I’m thinking that this isn’t the year to be a skeptic and I’m trusting the advice of my friends and family who are in the medical world!)  I’m not writing this to get the debate going about whether to vaccinate or not… that’s a personal decision… do your research and decide for yourselves!

Rather, I’m writing to address the mass panic… It is easy to live in fear… in fear of getting sick… in fear of germs everywhere… in fear of our children getting sick and ending up like the kids we’ve heard about on the news…

PANIC

FEAR

WORRY

I have caught myself begin to panic a few times over the last couple of weeks… but I just need to recognize it, and change the fear and worrying into prayer… The panic around me has fueled my prayer to God for my children and our family… for health, for protection, and for so much more…

Prayer and looking to God’s truths in scripture give me peace as they take my eyes away from my circumstances, and rather remind me that there is an all-knowing, powerful God who is present and at work – not just in a cosmic distant way, but in a close and personal way.  He knows me, my family and everything about us, and even better, He loves us and cares for us.  Prayer keeps me focused on who God is and melts away fear and worry.

Now does that mean that we will be free from illness, tragedy and heartache in our lives?  No.  But I do believe that God hears our prayers and answers them in ways that He knows are best for us in the long term.  That can be impossible for any of us to understand depending on what we’re coping with.  In the face of those difficult times, I do believe that God gives us the strength to handle whatever we are up against just when we need it, and that it somehow fits into a larger plan that I may be unable to make sense of in the moment.

Here are two of my favourite verses that bring me hope and peace – as well as a few others!

“Ah Sovereign Lord, you have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and your outstretch arm.  Nothing is too hard for you.”  Jeremiah 32:17

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7

“Be strong and courageous.  Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”  Joshua 1:9

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”  1 Peter 5:7

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest.” – Jesus (Matthew 11:28)

“Do not be afraid, for I am with you”  Isaiah 43:5a

I leave you with this prayer from Romans 15:13 :  May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

This morning as I lay in bed, I could hear my 6-year-old daughter singing quietly to herself in her bed. What a great way to start the day. I much prefer when she wakes up singing then when I have to wake her up, exhausted on a school day, and she’s whining and complaining that she’s too tired to get up yet… I choose singing over whining any day of the week! (if only it were my choice to make)

I do have other choices to make that affect my mornings though… will I press snooze, which results in a rushed morning to get myself ready and everyone up and going too… will I eat breakfast right away as I feed the girls, or will I get busy with 1001 tasks only to realize that I’m grumpy because I still haven’t eaten (I don’t function well without breakfast)… and the one which has the greatest impact on my day: will I sit and take a moment to read my Bible as I eat breakfast before I rush off and continue with the rest of my day (before or after the kids have eaten)…

Why is that last one so significant? Because I find that reading my Bible in the morning sets me up for a better day. It gets me refocused, invites God into my day from the start, and leads to a heart of prayer as I sit in the car driving to work, or doing tasks around the house – praying for my husband, my girls, friends, family, etc. In short, it puts life in perspective and reminds me that God is with me through each moment of my day.

I find that I’ve not been starting off my day right the past while, and I’ve been feeling it… impatience… rushing from one task to the next feeling like I’m not getting ahead… I have had seasons where I can pour into deeper studies, and others where I can barely get to just read a brief devotional with reflections written by various people based on a short passage.I’m in a busy season, and knowing that I’ve been missing the mark too often in past months, I’m back to picking up a devotional, though light, it at least is a start to get me focused in the morning and is better then nothing!

So I may not be able to choose if my daughter will wake up singing or cranky, but I can choose to take even just a minute to refocus my day by reaching for God’s Word. What a difference it makes to my day!

Today’s post is going to be rather different then you’d normally find on my blog… I’m taking part in the BTG synchroblog along with over 50 other bloggers… check out the BTG blog to see the full list and read posts from many different perspectives on how we can “bridge the gap”.

A few months ago, our small group from church worked through the pilot study called “Bridging the Gap: Conversations on befriending our gay neighbours” (The executive producer being Wendy Gritter who wrote in the June/July issue of our Deeper Newsletter). I must say with all honesty that going in, I was a bit reluctant, not quite sure of what I was getting into… particularly feeling responsible for having brought a co-worker and friend to the group, unsure of how the topic would be broached…

My attitude changed quickly as I looked over the DVD cover and saw the names of some of the speakers involved… Tony Campolo, Bruxy Cavey, Greg Paul… And I liked the approach they were proposing: this study was not about debating whether homosexuality is right or wrong, rather, we would put all that aside to examine how it is that we as Christians, can love like Jesus, regardless of how different our convictions may be from those around us.

I appreciated the fact that different points of view were represented… There were those who believed that despite being gay, God wanted them to remain celibate, while others believed that God blessed gay marriage but not promiscuity… it’s quite the hot topic when faith and sexuality collide… Listening to those sharing their thoughts on the DVD, one could not deny that each person loved God and was dedicated to following Christ, though somehow, they had arrived to different conclusions in their study of the same Bible.

Now this is where many of us Christians might struggle… but as Bruxy challenged us, instead of jumping to conclusions and questioning how people come to hold their convictions, we should give all the benefit of the doubt and get to know them instead of labelling, stereotyping and judging… It’s really about individuals, and should not be about an “issue” which dictates an automatic response to every gay person that crosses our path…

I truly feel that the BTG study should be done by so many more as it challenges those of us who are Christians to truly reach out like Jesus did, beyond our comfortable “Christian bubbles”. And this in no way means that you need to compromise your own convictions, it’s more about examining your responses to others.

The beauty of this study is that it extends well beyond how we interact with the gay people in our lives. It is really about how we can love through deep disagreements, whatever those may be, when it otherwise would be easier to cut people off instead of working through it, accepting that in the end, we may still arrive to different conclusions.

Though I’ve heard these two words get confused, I do believe that there is a clear difference between tolerance and acceptance. Tolerance has no love. It’s cold, indifferent and says: “You stay over there and do your thing, and I’ll stay over here and do mine… just don’t bug me and we’ll be fine…” Whereas acceptance says: “I love you, care about you, and want you to be a part of my life.” Acceptance doesn’t mean that you need to be like-minded – no two people are completely – so there must be room to disagree and still accept, love and respect one another.

Speaking as a Christian, I must admit that the church (collectively) traditionally has not been good at tolerating or accepting people in the gay community (or anyone who might have different thoughts then us or appear rough around the edges for that matter)…

I was just reading my Bible in Acts 10 and was reminded of how the apostle Peter was challenged in a vision with the fact that God shows no favouritism. Peter assumed that the message of Jesus was for the Jews alone, but he learned that God had sent Jesus for ALL. I recently read this version of Acts 10:34-35 which I loved:

“Peter fairly exploded with his good news: “It’s God’s own truth, nothing could be plainer: God plays no favorites! It makes no difference who you are or where you’re from – if you want God and are ready to do as he says, the door is open.” (The Message)

Jesus thankfully doesn’t tell us to come to Him when we are perfectly like Him… He’d be left alone… rather, He invites us all to come as we are… Jesus made time for the marginalized and outcasts of the day: the tax collectors, the prostitutes, the lepers… whatever their issues and struggles, He accepted and loved people even when no one else did. If we are to be the body of Christ, His hands and feet, aren’t we to love like Him in order to represent Him well in the world instead of building up more walls and cutting more people off who many not look, dress or believe exactly like us??

So what does loving like Jesus mean? Perhaps less judging, less jumping to conclusions, less making people feel terrible about themselves… and more loving unconditionally, more investing in the lives of others, meeting them where they are, even when it’s not easy… Once someone has come to the place where they have accepted Jesus as their Saviour, then we can trust God to be at work in their lives, through the Holy Spirit just as He is in ours… He’s in the business of changing hearts and lives… and often times, when we’re so stuck on what others need to change in their lives, God is trying to show us what we need to change in our own…

Tony Campolo reminded us of this as he discussed the pat answer so many of us Christians use… “Love the sinner, hate the sin”… But really Jesus taught that we are to examine our own lives first and not always be so quick to point the finger!! None of us have life all figured out… More transparency is good… Why is it that we Christians are often afraid for people (in and outside the church) to see our imperfections? We are all a work in progress!

To wrap things up, I strongly recommend getting friends together to work through the 4 week BTG study. It’s well worth the time… and you can be sure that you will be stretched by it. The study truly broke the ice for our group, taking us from surface level discussions about faith, to real, honest and deep conversations. It has been tough to transition into a new study as most don’t seem to foster such great discussions that get us thinking and talking about various applications in our lives throughout the week!

Visit New Direction for more information or to purchase the BTG study. Also check out who else is blogging in today’s BTG synchroblog and see what perspective they bring to the discussion!

Are you living life to the fullest?  Are you using all of your God given gifts as He intended when He gave them to you?  If you are a follower of Christ, do you know what your spiritual gifts are?  Are you using them to serve God?

We talked about this at church this past Sunday (to find and hear the message dated May 25, 2009, click here).

Ironically enough, I stumbled upon a blog entry today about the same thing over at Today’s Christian Woman called the ”To-Be List”.  To Be: Gifted being the focus of the day.

As was written in that blog post: “It’s easy to know in concept that God created us all with unique gifts and passions and abilities.  But it’s another thing altogether to identify those gifts, to cultivate those gifts, and to seek outlets for using those gifts.”

If reading that resonates with you, then you’ll for sure want to read the entire blog post.  You’ll be given the opportunity to take a spiritual gift inventory as well as more ideas and resources to get you to look at ways you could be living and serving in your giftedness.

Read “To Be: Gifted”.

We were each created with a purpose for our lives.  Are you using the gifts God gave you to the full extent that He has created you for?

Hmmm… gives us all cause to pause in the busyness of our lives.

The past number of months, I’ve had a 3 and 6 year old who will break into song out of the blue with various Mamma Mia! tunes at the top of their lungs (doesn’t matter where we are either… for the 3 year old anyway!)

They were introduced to ABBA by their aunt, cousin and grandmother and have been singing the songs non-stop ever since!  It’s been an experience for daddy!  It’s a good thing I like to sing and dance along!  I think I would have put off their discovery of Mamma Mia! until they were a bit older though… some of the lyrics are rather ahead of their time!

“Mom, what does:  ‘Give me, Give me, Give me a man after midnight’ mean?”

Oh boy…

On the one hand, I’ve had to repeatedly remind my nearly 4-year old that even if they slide down the banister and jump on the bed in Mamma Mia!, it doesn’t mean that it’s okay!… And on the other, my 6 year old inquisitive daughter has been dissecting the lyrics to the songs with her incredible memory, asking me about this line, and that… The movie and songs have actually sparked some great conversations with her which has been great.  She’s had so many questions, such as…

“Sophie is 20!  She’s not old enough to get married, is she?… Is she old enough to babysit?”

Then came this question:

“Mom, what does ‘Don’t go wasting your emotions… lay all your love on me’ mean?”

I don’t tend to over-spiritualize everything with my kids, but as I stopped to think about it, this is the only response that really made sense to me (though she gets that it’s not really what they meant in the movie – but this is what makes more sense)…

“That’s exactly what God wants us to do!  He wants us to stop wasting our emotions on things like worry and fear, and instead to lay all our love on Him!  When we love Him first and remember how much He loves us, then we can stop wasting our emotions on some of those other things that drain us for nothing…”

God speaking through an ABBA song?  Who knew.  It does jive with so many verses in the Bible though…

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.” Deuteronomy 6:5

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;  in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths.”  Proverbs 3:5-6

Are you “wasting” your emotions?  It’s so easy to get wrapped up in our daily troubles and allow them to consume us… God’s there calling us to lift our eyes from our “stuff” that so entangles us, and to look to Him for peace…

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”  Philippians 4:6-7

I love how our pastor put it in his sermon entitled “Worry-Less Living” in April…  He called it “The Phil 4-6 Principle”:  Worry about NOTHING, Pray about EVERYTHING.

So easily said… I just need to remember it when it matters!

“Be still and know that I am God.”  Psalm 46:10a

This is one of my favourite verses.  A good friend made a plaque for me and it hangs in my house, reminding me of this verse every time I walk by it.

That same friend was here for a visit a few weeks ago – she filled my heart, and blessed my family.  She made me laugh, she helped me care for my boys, she listened to me, and she reminded me what being still is all about.

Events from the past year have left me with a fatigue I can’t shake and a weariness that doesn’t go away with a little R&R.  I am in search of rest – for my soul.

I’ve been looking in all the wrong places – watching more TV, taking a family vacation, eating out more, and resigning from activities left, right and centre.

I recently finished a book called The Rest of God by Mark Buchanan.  I found what I’ve been searching for – a recipe for true rest.  Simply put it requires listening for God’s voice, soaking in His presence, paying attention to what He’s doing in my life, and enjoying all He’s given me.

As we begin the journey of discovering what it means to be a new creation in Christ, and what that means for our family, it’s good to just be still. It’s good to be quiet before God and listen for His voice before taking even one step.  It’s good to set out at a slow and steady pace, not rushing to the next stop or peeking around the next bend, but instead enjoying our fellow travellers and the scenery that surrounds us.

The day my first son was born, a new something was also born in me.  I don’t know if every parent feels the way I did, or if I am especially neurotic.  I just know that along with a deep, aching love, was an oppressive fear that I could lose my child.  My very soul left my body and transposed into a tiny baby boy, naked and vulnerable.  I was paralyzed by the thought of anything hurting him.

Almost two years later, my worst nightmare became reality for a friend of mine.  It was just an accident, and a little one was gone.  There are things that I wish I didn’t even know could happen.  Things that take a long time to heal and things for which heaven itself may be the only balm. The pain of seeing a family suffer in the cruelest way was too much for me to bear.  I no longer believed God was good or even that He was at all.  I sunk my claws deep into the idol of my child and turned my arrogant back on Him.

I went through the church motions for a couple of years because it was easier than admitting my anger.  One day during worship I reached my end.  All around hands flung wildly in the air while the crowd sang heartily “Blessed be Your Name, on the road marked with suffering…”.  I couldn’t choke out the words.  I wanted to put my hands over my ears because it hurt so bad to hear.

“You give and take away, my heart will choose to say, Blessed be Your Name.”  How could anyone sing that?  There was a time when those words would have flown from my mouth with fervor.  My pride would not let me sing it now.

I had something too precious to lose.

I cried.  I was frustrated.  I was also tired of trying to be Him.  Being Him made me lifeless, more scared and lonely than ever.  I felt trapped between living with my dead self or choosing to submit to a God I couldn’t understand.   I never thought I would pass on a weak, wounded faith to my kids.  The one thing I was hiding from was the one thing I knew my boys needed more than safety, more than happiness, more than life.  More than me.

I wanted them to know God.  My God.  My God who redeems anything.

Finding my way back is taking more trust, more grace, and more humility than I ever wanted to give.  Before, my faith was based on an expectation of security.  Now I know nothing is certain.  I guess I’m just finally okay with that.  I don’t want to say yes to Him “only if…”.   I want to say yes “even if…”.

So God, here I am.

Andi is the mother to Toby, 4, and Charlie, 1.  When she is not wiping boogers she chronicles life with her young family on her blog, “The Running Mama” at www.andihawkins.com.

I just watched the Bee Movie with Jerry Seinfeld. There were lots of great lines in there that got me thinking… The movie starts off with this narration (which also appears in print on the screen)… I just had to write this down…

“According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a bee should be able to fly.
It’s wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.
The bee, or course, flies anyway.
Because bees don’t care what humans think is impossible.”

I just love that! So typical of us to think that we know everything – have an answer and an explanation for everything and think that we can determine what is possible and impossible. I started looking up a few Bible verses about the possible and the impossible and I found a recurring theme of the impossible only being possible with God…

At one point, a man comes to Jesus asking Him, if it’s at all possible, to heal his son who has been having seizures since childhood (“if you can” he says)… Jesus’ response: “If you can? Everything is possible for him who believes.” (Mark 9:23) Who are we to limit what God can do when we come to Him and ask in faith!

Mark 10:27 “With man this [being saved] is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God.”

Jeremiah 32:17 “Ah Sovereign Lord, you have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and outstretched arm. Nothing is too hard for you.”

Philippians 4:13 “I can do everything through him who gives me strength.”

Then there’s Hebrews 11:6 “Without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.”

Human wisdom… an oxymoron? I’m thinking so!  I love that James 1:5 assures us that if any of us lacks wisdom, we should ask God who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to us. And with that and the knowledge that all things are possible with God… there is hope for us yet!

The past year, my senses have truly been heightened to those hurting all around me… close by and abroad… Friends living far from family, unable to return to their home country where they would be persecuted for their faith in Christ… friends with struggling marriages… some facing nasty custody battles and endless legal proceedings and false accusations… too many walking with loved ones through their fight with cancer… friends struck suddenly with inexplicable illnesses that have momentarily and at times permanently rocked their worlds… others struggling with infertility… husbands working far from home… then news of a baby girl (seemingly barely 1 from the photos) battling with stage 4 cancer… and reading the stories of some of the children members of my church’s mission trip to Cambodia are encountering…

I have also recently been introduced to the International Justice Mission and have just read a book called “Terrify No More” which tells of their work in Cambodia and around the world to free and seek justice for victims of sex-trafficking and of bonded labour, etc. I’m also finishing a book called “One – A face behind the numbers” where Vaden Earle from Absolute Leadership Development brings to light the injustice that so many in the world face and our need for us to step up, become aware and take action!

All of this has led me to one main response… Why am I so blessed Lord? I have a loving and faithful husband, healthy beautiful children, a lovely spacious home, a tight-knit loving extended family, caring friends and a wonderful church community. We are blessed beyond belief. As I sat the other night praying for those hurting around me and wondering why we are continually blessed, the answer that came was this…

We are blessed so that we may bless others.

We can’t respond to others’ stories with the fear of illness, injury or accidents striking our family. That response keeps my eyes on me. It’s selfish and a useless waste of energy and emotion – though I sometimes have to remind myself. No, I really believe that we are blessed so that we can bless others with our time, our resources, our friendships and our prayers.

I wrote about my desire to teach my kids about compassion back in October… getting their eyes off their own little lives and desires and to recognize the needs of others around them. I think I am the one who has been learning the lesson more than anyone. It’s so easy to get consumed by my own busy life and family, with my only worries being paying the bills at the end of the month, getting my kids through their colds and flus and preparing my 3-year old for school in September.

I have been feeling a new and increasing burden to pray for those who cross my path the past while. You know, it’s a funny thing to pray more for others. It takes my eyes off me and my troubles as they arise which seem SO BIG when they’re my main focus. But as I look to God and trust Him to act in the lives of others, lifting them up in prayer, it builds my faith to remember that God is a powerful God who will take care of my worries which seem to be nothing at all regardless of how bad my day seems!

I am blessed. As John Waller talks about in his song “The Blessing”, I can and will choose to be a blessing!

The past few days I’ve been feeling off. I’ve been getting frustrated and impatient with the kids a lot, over-exhausted with a sinus headache that just won’t go, letting me know that I’m getting the cold the rest of our household has… still no excuse for losing my cool.

Then I think of a conversation I had last weekend with a friend of mine. She was telling me about a Muslim friend of hers who was trying to figure out how to could greet her during the Easter season out of love and respect for her. “Do I wish you a ‘Happy Good Friday’” she asked? My friend responded that no! That was the day they killed Jesus! It’s on the Sunday that we celebrate, for He rose again!

Good Friday. I prefer the French term “Vendredi Saint” – Holy Friday, as “good” makes it sound like it’s a party day! That, it is not… What a day for me to have a morning of losing my cool with my kids with impatience… a day when the gravity of my messing up is all too real… remembering that Jesus had to die on the cross for me… for my many moments of messing up… so that I would have the opportunity to be made right with God and see Him in heaven one day… So, today, on Good Friday, I find myself again asking for forgiveness for messing up, thankful, though saddened by the immense sacrifice that was done on my behalf because I could never be perfect enough to earn my way to heaven… no, His gruesome death was required. Ouch! (click here to read more on that…)

Then I can’t help but think of Sunday… because I thank God the story didn’t end on the sombre Holy Friday! As Easter’s been approaching, I’ve actually been thinking a lot about my late uncle Ted the past little while. He was like a grand-father figure in our family… Easter was a most Holy and serious time of year for him. We knew to never bother him in the time leading up to Easter as he was preoccupied with practicing his organ in preparation. Once the Easter morning service was done, we could visit and he would unmistakably greet us with “He is RISEN!” at which we would respond “He is risen indeed!”

So today we reflect on the gravity of Christ’s death on the cross and what it means to us personally… but soon we party! For He is risen indeed!

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16

“He was handed over to die because of our sins, and was raised to life to make us right with God.” Romans 4:25 (New Living Translation)